It’s my wedding day. The wedding is set to start any minute, but the cake isn’t here. Neither are the flowers. My mom is still in sweats and I can’t find a single person to help me zip my dress up. Where’s my wedding coordinator? She’s not here either? Why does no one care we are running behind? Why is no one answering me?
I wake up in a cold sweat. This is just one of the many wedding day nightmares I’ve been having for the past month. The dreams are never exactly the same, but the themes are always similar. I’ve either forgotten something – my dress, to order the flowers or the wedding day entirely or everything is running behind and I can’t find anyone to help me move things along.
Vivid dreams are something I am no stranger to. I have completely random, bizarre dreams pretty much every night and I always remember them. I’ve also always had these types of nightmares leading up to any important event like vacations, job interviews or final exams.
With my wedding four days away, the nightmares aren’t slowing down. If anything though, these nightmares have me aware that my brain is working overtime preparing for this wedding. I’ve made a checklist of things to help you, if you’re like me and are plagued by wedding day nightmares.
1. Make a list – Write down everything that still needs to be done for the wedding both big and small. It’s hard work trying to keep all those things in your head and it’s probably contributing to those dreams. By writing it down, you are freeing your mind of the burden of remembering these things, plus there’s so much satisfaction in checking things off a list when they are done.
2. Ask for help – There is no shame in asking for help and you’ll be surprised at how many people want to help. Whether it’s mundane tasks like stuffing envelopes or bigger, more exciting tasks like picking out floral arrangements, bring some one along. It’s always more fun doing something with another person rather than alone.
3. Take time off – If you can’t take a whole day, then even take a few hours. Do something that is completely unrelated to wedding prep. Go for a massage, a bike ride, to a kickboxing class or for a facial. Find something you love doing and do it (with no guilt!). It will recharge you to keep going with the planning and is a great reward for your hard work.
4. Talk to other brides – Have a heart-to-heart with friends that are married. It’s pretty likely they’ve had the same fears and stresses and probably have some amazing advice on how to handle it. Even just sharing your concerns with someone who has been there is helpful. They know where you are coming from and know how to ease your mind.
5. Don’t wish it away – I hear so many brides say, “I can’t wait until this is over.” I think this is one of the worst phrases associated with weddings. This is such an exciting time in your life. When you look back on it you won’t want to have wished it away. It will go by fast and you want to be present, enjoying each moment not wishing the day was done.
As my wedding day approaches, do you have any advice for me or other 2014 brides?