You should go into every first date with an open mind and no judgement. First dates in themselves can induce sweaty palms, awkward silences and jitters all at once so you should always give your date a fair chance. There are, however, some definite first date deal breakers that you should never overlook:
1. He’s obnoxiously late. I get sometimes being late is beyond your control. Traffic, delayed transit, trying to find a parking spot and getting lost are all valid reasons to be a few minutes late. However, anything longer than ten minutes with no text or call is someone wasting your time. If he apologizes profusely when he arrives, give him a second chance, but if he acts like he did nothing out of the ordinary then its clear he does not value your time.
2. He loves himself. Confidence is sexy, but being cocky is not. A good first date should contain conversation. Conversation being defined as two people talking back and forth about mutual things, not one person talking about themselves the entire time. Being self-absorbed is not sexy so if you spend the entire date listening to your date blab on about themselves with no interest in you, there should be no date #2.
3. He’s rude. Not everyone was raised with manners but some form of human decency should be inherent. If your date is rude to those around you, it’s a good indication of how he will be when you date. I once when on a date where the guy refused to give up the seat beside him in a packed movie theatre because it for his coat. Not only was this a red flag, but it made me so embarrassed that people thought he was my boyfriend and that I condoned this rude behaviour. There’s a lot qualities a partner should have and being rude isn’t one of them.
4. He talks non-stop about his ex. I get that past relationships come up during first dates. I think its best to always remain politically correct and be polite when discussing exes. Keep the topic short and move on. If a guy keeps bringing up his ex or spends a lot of time bashing her, he’s not over his ex. This should be a red flag that he is not ready to be dating and won’t make a good love match until he works through his past.
5. He’s critical. A first date is like a fact finding mission. You’re getting to know each other, your basic values and personalities in order to find out if you should keep seeing each other. If your date is overly critical about things you share with them on the first date, like your education, food preferences or past life experiences, move on. Someone who can’t even be polite when you barely know them is not someone you want to continue seeing.
What are some of your dating deal breakers?