Tuesday, March 4, 2014

Reasons Why I Think Jared Leto is Jesus

After seeing Jared Leto standing up at the Oscar podium on Sunday, accepting his Best Supporting Actor award for his work in Dallas Buyers Club, I could only think one thing: Jesus has come back to Earth in the body of Jared Leto.


His appearance - First off, let's state the obvious. The luscious, flowing locks of hair, and the angelic glow of his bronzed skin, he straight just looks like J.C. himself. Plus, the man is over forty and hasn't aged since the late 90s. He's gotta have some sort of Jesus miracle thing going on to keep him looking so timeless.

His mother - Jared brought his mother to the Oscars as his date. I feel that if Jesus were to go the Oscars he would bring Mary, the light of his life, his own mother. Jared stood up on the stage and shared how important his mother was in shaping who he is and later in show even made her she got a slice of pizza from Ellen.


His clothes - Jesus often dressed in white and Jared chose to wear a  crisp, white suit jacket to the Oscars. White is a colour often associated with purity and cleanliness. I think it was no coincidence that Jared chose white as his Oscar look.

His speech - Jared's speech touched on current, hard-hitting issues like AIDS and the conflict in the Ukraine and Venezuela and  he dedicated his Oscar to the millions who have lost their lives from AIDS. If you're asking WWJD, he would do that.

His generosity - After winning his Oscar, he became the first winner in history to pass his Oscar around to the press in the press room, allowing them to hold and touch his Oscar. Sharing is caring.


He protects us from Satan - Jared is shown here photobombing Anne Hathaway at the Oscars Sunday night. This is in a clear effort to not let Anne's already giant head get any bigger, and thus dropping her down a few pegs. And yes, you all knew deep down that Anne Hathaway is Satan.

In conclusion, Jared Leto = Jesus.


13 comments:

  1. HAHA loved this article! Very good reasons!

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  2. I am a member of the Church of Jared Leto

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  3. i only remember jared leto as the crazy, weird, creepy drug addict in requiem for a dream and had no idea that he'd become relevant in the last few years!!

    -kathy | Vodka and Soda

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  4. Best post ever? I think so!

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  5. ded. this is hilarious haha. i love him.

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  6. He's over 40?? Dang that makes me feel super old. I remember watching him in My So-Called Life. Where does the time go? And he looks really great for his age.

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  7. haha - well done on all points!

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  8. Hahaha Kathy's comment is exactly what I was thinking! Also, I didn't know Anne Hathaway had a big head. I thought she was pretty modest?

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  9. This is hilarious.....and I could get lost in those blue eyes and ombre hair....he really nailed the perfect ratio of blonde to brown ;-)

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  10. Ha, this is hilarious! I've been obsessed with Jared Leto since My So Called Life. Love him :)
    xo TJ

    http://www.hislittlelady.com

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  11. The truth is he named himself after one of Apostles of Jesus : Bartholomew Cubbins, because he wants to be one of Apostles not the Jesus, but he likes Jesus and just want to dress up like him, that's it. and FYI the REAL Jesus (not AMERICAN Jesus) wasn't blonde and did not have blue eyes.

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